Friday, May 29, 2009An Open Letter

To: The old guy sitting at the table next to us at dinner tonight.

Was it really necessary to sit with your circle of old lady friends right next to us and proceed to fart your way through our meal? Seriously, the restaurant was almost empty, you could have at least sat across the room if you really had to add your gaseous aroma to the dining experience. Or here’s a novel concept - make an excuse to go to the bathroom or outside for a moment to relieve yourself of whatever died up your ass to cause such a stench.

Sincerely,
The woman with the misbehaving children whose crab cakes you ruined.

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